Before former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich got thrown out of office, he decided to appoint perennial laughingstock Roland Burris to the senate seat vacated by President Obama.
A little bit of history: the last time Burris held elected office by voter mandate was when grunge was still popular and gangsta rap was still up and coming. It took a governor accused of trying to sell his power to finally get him back into elected office.
Even his own party didn't want him to become senator, because they knew how vulnerable that seat would be once it comes up for election next year.
More recently, Burris has faced scrutiny over his testimony during Blagojevich's impeachment proceedings. First, he said he didn't have any dealings with anyone related to Blago. Then, there was a conversation with his brother. Now, it turns out, there was talk of Burris raising money for Blago's potential reelection campaign as Blago considered who to appoint to the senate.
There's no linkage here. I simply recommend using your favorite search engine to find news reports related to Burris.
Burris, as talkative as he is, hasn't been talking to the press recently. I personally recommend a rather hilarious radio clip from WBBM 780 AM in Chicago. Reporters were trying to get Burris to talk, and some ignorant fool defends him, saying that the people put Burris in office. When it's pointed out to her that the disgraced Blagojevich put him there, she still defends him, claiming Burris is some sort of champion.
Heh. Maybe Burris can add that to his tombstone. "Appointed champion by crooked gov." Again, I recommend using your favorite search engine, utilizing the keywords "Roland Burris tombstone." Hilarity will surely ensue.
I'd say Burris should quit, but I'm scared of what sort of opportunistic, self-serving criminal will replace him.
Times like this, I'm glad for the second amendment.
17 February 2009
06 February 2009
You decide to open the left door.
After a brief hesitation, the scent of fresh, cool air washes over you. Nothing is obvious beyond the doorway except what appear to be a sunlight beaming down into a dark room. There is just a faint hint of dust, but little else. It reminds you of an interrogation room.
You enter the room, knowing that certain death waits mere moments down the hall. Someone once told you that you never really can expect betrayal, because you would never trust someone who would betray you. There was relief in the memory of that conversation. You close the door, and attempt to stay as quiet possible.
The room was mostly bare, with the exception of a skylight that seemed quiet far above you and a single green mushroom-shaped push button on the wall. You figure that must be the light switch.
As you contemplate pushing the button, you hear the faint and muffled commotion on the other side. The reality of your escape must be setting in on your former second-in-command, as yelling turned to pleading frustration and bullets bounced off of the metal door. The goons that now ran with that scumbag couldn't open the door, try as they might. You slouch and breathe a sigh of relief.
You decide that to gain the upper hand if they do make it through the door, it would be to your advantage to shut the light off. With that, you slam your palm on the green button. The sound of mechanisms coming to life began, but something else happened that you did not expect- the floor began to elevate towards the skylight! The door and button on the wall quickly zip below the floor and you head towards certain freedom.
As you rise, you reflect on the day now behind you. Your vision, creating a moment to oust the corrupt ruler of her secretive dictatorship, and the elegence of your strategy to do it, simply relied on too much trust. Next time, you will be better at vetting your command. The floor is raising quite rapidly now. You smirk with the sense of luck that you feel for the escape.
Except that you don't escape. When the elevator floor reaches the correct height, you are knocked to the floor by a mesh of barely visible diamond cutting wire. You only have the time to realize it when the wire starts moving, slicing through your skin and musculature. Within seconds the saws contact the bone, and seconds more through the bone itself. The pain shoots through you like a universe of fire. Your screaming is cut short quickly as the wire slices efficiently through your vocal cords. The last sight your eyes register is the spraying of your blood as you are torn to shreds.
You enter the room, knowing that certain death waits mere moments down the hall. Someone once told you that you never really can expect betrayal, because you would never trust someone who would betray you. There was relief in the memory of that conversation. You close the door, and attempt to stay as quiet possible.
The room was mostly bare, with the exception of a skylight that seemed quiet far above you and a single green mushroom-shaped push button on the wall. You figure that must be the light switch.
As you contemplate pushing the button, you hear the faint and muffled commotion on the other side. The reality of your escape must be setting in on your former second-in-command, as yelling turned to pleading frustration and bullets bounced off of the metal door. The goons that now ran with that scumbag couldn't open the door, try as they might. You slouch and breathe a sigh of relief.
You decide that to gain the upper hand if they do make it through the door, it would be to your advantage to shut the light off. With that, you slam your palm on the green button. The sound of mechanisms coming to life began, but something else happened that you did not expect- the floor began to elevate towards the skylight! The door and button on the wall quickly zip below the floor and you head towards certain freedom.
As you rise, you reflect on the day now behind you. Your vision, creating a moment to oust the corrupt ruler of her secretive dictatorship, and the elegence of your strategy to do it, simply relied on too much trust. Next time, you will be better at vetting your command. The floor is raising quite rapidly now. You smirk with the sense of luck that you feel for the escape.
Except that you don't escape. When the elevator floor reaches the correct height, you are knocked to the floor by a mesh of barely visible diamond cutting wire. You only have the time to realize it when the wire starts moving, slicing through your skin and musculature. Within seconds the saws contact the bone, and seconds more through the bone itself. The pain shoots through you like a universe of fire. Your screaming is cut short quickly as the wire slices efficiently through your vocal cords. The last sight your eyes register is the spraying of your blood as you are torn to shreds.
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