More political scandal in Illinois? Say it ain't so!

Before former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich got thrown out of office, he decided to appoint perennial laughingstock Roland Burris to the senate seat vacated by President Obama.
A little bit of history: the last time Burris held elected office by voter mandate was when grunge was still popular and gangsta rap was still up and coming. It took a governor accused of trying to sell his power to finally get him back into elected office.
Even his own party didn't want him to become senator, because they knew how vulnerable that seat would be once it comes up for election next year.
More recently, Burris has faced scrutiny over his testimony during Blagojevich's impeachment proceedings. First, he said he didn't have any dealings with anyone related to Blago. Then, there was a conversation with his brother. Now, it turns out, there was talk of Burris raising money for Blago's potential reelection campaign as Blago considered who to appoint to the senate.
There's no linkage here. I simply recommend using your favorite search engine to find news reports related to Burris.
Burris, as talkative as he is, hasn't been talking to the press recently. I personally recommend a rather hilarious radio clip from WBBM 780 AM in Chicago. Reporters were trying to get Burris to talk, and some ignorant fool defends him, saying that the people put Burris in office. When it's pointed out to her that the disgraced Blagojevich put him there, she still defends him, claiming Burris is some sort of champion.
Heh. Maybe Burris can add that to his tombstone. "Appointed champion by crooked gov." Again, I recommend using your favorite search engine, utilizing the keywords "Roland Burris tombstone." Hilarity will surely ensue.
I'd say Burris should quit, but I'm scared of what sort of opportunistic, self-serving criminal will replace him.
Times like this, I'm glad for the second amendment.

You decide to open the left door.

After a brief hesitation, the scent of fresh, cool air washes over you. Nothing is obvious beyond the doorway except what appear to be a sunlight beaming down into a dark room. There is just a faint hint of dust, but little else. It reminds you of an interrogation room.
You enter the room, knowing that certain death waits mere moments down the hall. Someone once told you that you never really can expect betrayal, because you would never trust someone who would betray you. There was relief in the memory of that conversation. You close the door, and attempt to stay as quiet possible.
The room was mostly bare, with the exception of a skylight that seemed quiet far above you and a single green mushroom-shaped push button on the wall. You figure that must be the light switch.
As you contemplate pushing the button, you hear the faint and muffled commotion on the other side. The reality of your escape must be setting in on your former second-in-command, as yelling turned to pleading frustration and bullets bounced off of the metal door. The goons that now ran with that scumbag couldn't open the door, try as they might. You slouch and breathe a sigh of relief.
You decide that to gain the upper hand if they do make it through the door, it would be to your advantage to shut the light off. With that, you slam your palm on the green button. The sound of mechanisms coming to life began, but something else happened that you did not expect- the floor began to elevate towards the skylight! The door and button on the wall quickly zip below the floor and you head towards certain freedom.
As you rise, you reflect on the day now behind you. Your vision, creating a moment to oust the corrupt ruler of her secretive dictatorship, and the elegence of your strategy to do it, simply relied on too much trust. Next time, you will be better at vetting your command. The floor is raising quite rapidly now. You smirk with the sense of luck that you feel for the escape.
Except that you don't escape. When the elevator floor reaches the correct height, you are knocked to the floor by a mesh of barely visible diamond cutting wire. You only have the time to realize it when the wire starts moving, slicing through your skin and musculature. Within seconds the saws contact the bone, and seconds more through the bone itself. The pain shoots through you like a universe of fire. Your screaming is cut short quickly as the wire slices efficiently through your vocal cords. The last sight your eyes register is the spraying of your blood as you are torn to shreds.

Macabre Story Endings

Someone was once explaining to me that there was a guy who would present a group of writers with a story climax and give them two pages to write the denouement. Thing was, the ending didn't have to be -explicitly- gruesome, it just couldn't end well. You didn't really have a developed, well, anything (plot, character, enviroment), it would just be a statement like "You decide to open the left door."

I think I'm going to try that. My next post will be the story ending for "You decide to open the left door."

Dentistry Episode III: The Phantom Appeal

Got yet another mail from my former dental insurance provider. This one states they received my appeal for a denial of claim payment for services in Auguest 2007.
Problem is, I never filed an appeal.
So, this means my former dentist has failed to file paperwork, and is now attempting to cover their asses by posing as me. Nevermind the whole false claim that they filed from August of 2008, for an appointment that I never had with that office.
I've given up being mad about this and decided to just be entertained by this place's continued bungling and stupidity. Do they think that I won't get notified by the insurance company? Really? All this for less than $200? For something that should have been taken care of if the office was even remotely competent? Really?
I have to shake my head and laugh.
For a relatively small amount of money, this office has guaranteed that not only will I never do business with them again, but that I will recommend any and everyone I know to avoid them. Further, they've made me want to toy with them. Insurance fraud can be a big deal, and I'm sure they don't want to deal with an investigation into this.
Yep. Come normal business hours, the plan is to contact the insurance company and find out about all interactions between them and my dentist, procuring paperwork along the way.
Let's see if the dentist's capable staff asks me for help out of this one.

Inauguration Thoughts From D.C.

*Why did they keep saying that it's a celebration of "peaceful transition?" Would not saying it mean that -chaos- would engage the country? Or is it, more to what I expect, a subtle Orwellian gesture of "the gov't really has you by the short and hairies?" "Peaceful because dissent is silenced?"

*Seriously, WTF with the poem. Maya Angelou's trainwreck, now whatever this idiot blathered?

*Perlman, Ma, etc. Great performance, horrible arrangement, utterly lost on the crowd of sheeple.

*Let's see if Obama can CHANGE the performance perception of modern Illinois politicians.

*How long will it be before Mr. President will be called an Uncle Tom by the black community?

*To Micheal Nudow (or whatever, I don't care enough to look up your name): Cram it, loser!

I have a new boss now!

Respecting the dead, traffic laws, and human decency

Sounds like some people are eager to join those honored during funeral processions.
I'd like you to read the story on this, then read some of the comments, especially from those who think funeral procession law needs to be changed. The story itself is incomplete; there could be other reasons for the accident. It's some of the comments that repulse me. It's symptomatic of the self-entitled, self-absorbed culture that what passes for humanity has seemingly become.
If you get through these comments without wanting to beat the hell out of some commentators, I commend you. You're a far more patient, forgiving person than I.
I'm guessing my vast audience of the two fellow authors and a few others have been in at least a few funeral processions. It sucks. You're grieving. You're paying respects to someone you love. You're there to lend support to those who may need a shoulder to cry on, or someone to talk to.
You shouldn't have to deal with some jerk who wants to cut you off because they really need that skim latte with an extra shot and they're running late for work. There's a reason laws for funeral processions exist. Sure, you can wear a tinfoil hat and say it's a funeral home owner conspiracy. Then again, you'd be the sort of person to interrupt a funeral procession.
Honestly, respect the dead, respect funeral processions, and respect those who grieve. If you have no human decency, try to fake it. You'll join the deceased soon enough. We all will.

Too Many Things to Do in Free Time

I've not been posting very much because, well, I've now got too many "hobbies."

The one occupying my time the most has been painting. Well, trying to reduce the backlog of primed, not painted miniatures. Seems like a never ending quest.

Then there's video games, another love of mine. Fallout 3 waits, patiently, in my 360. So does Penny Arcade: The Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness, Part 2.

Netflix? Logjam. Three movies that I watched while cleaning/priming minis and cleaning the apartment, all on Saturday. Which means...

TiVo? All the backlogged shows. No time to watch. Leverage, etc. Burn Notice and House haven't started yet. No time for anything else.

Facebook... yeah. Some people I know are really, REALLY into it, meaning they pound my inbox with request after request. I log on, handle as many requests as I can stomach, and log off.

Blogging. Well, I'd like to, except with all of those things on the brain, it's hard to keep "things to do" straight. And the last thing I want to do is structure my free time. It then is no longer free, and defeats the entire purpose of having it.

I'm going to start an online class soon, and if I don't get my ducks in a row you may not hear from me for months.

Dentist bookkeeping incompetence: the sequel!

This afternoon, I received some mail from my former dental insurance company. The notice advised me that they denied a claim made by my old dentist's office. They explained, quite reasonably, that they couldn't pay for services rendered after my coverage had lapsed.
Then, I saw something cute. And by cute, I mean fraudulent.
Turns out the office claimed I had last visited them for service on 8/21/08. The only problem is, I last visited them exactly one year prior to the date listed on the insurance notice. Haven't been back since.
Remember, I had an extended conversation with this office a couple weeks ago. They essentially told me I had to do their work and cover for their inability to file paperwork in a timely fashion. And the bill that they sent me was for services rendered on 8/21/07.
So it seems to me they're trying to pull a fast one, lying to the insurance company because they failed to file proper paperwork in the first place. I seriously doubt the office secretary accidentally got the date wrong, especially when I pointed out that my last visit was in '07, when I was still covered by this insurance.
One way or another, I expect this bill to be wiped out and receive written notification of it. If the dentist is really looking to get his money, perhaps he could dock $200 pay from his incompetent bookkeeper. After all, she's the one who cost him the money in the first place.
Fun times.

A few more things to consider about the AT&T outage.

Yep. I can't let it go.
Anyhoo, my good friend Google showed me a news article about Verizon Wireless building a switching center in Southfield, Michigan about four years ago. My good friend Mapquest shows a total distance of just over 5 miles between these 'burbs, give or take a bit of distance as I don't know the exact addresses of the facilities.
So! This means that, if indeed Verizon does have a switching center in Southfield, it's very possible, indeed probable, that switching center could have been affected by the same power outage that was at the root of AT&T's problems.
The difference? We haven't heard any news about Verizon customers being affected in the same way AT&T customers were.
Do I believe a power outage could cause a service disruption like this? Yes, but I also believe there were several failures along the way that caused this. Whether that's from a lazy NOC tech, lazy field tech, lackadaisical management or a combo thereof, I don't know.
What I do know is I'm sick of media outlets taking the word of public relations people as the gospel truth. Hard questions need to be asked, and some way or another, AT&T needs to be held accountable.

Dentists, insurance and incompetence

I was going through some old mail recently. I have a bad habit of not opening mail right away. I'd seen something from my old dentist, the fellow I used to go to when I worked with AT&T.
As I'm now working at Motorola and have different insurance, I have since visited a different dentist, one within walking distance of my apartment. I had my normally scheduled checkup a couple weeks ago. Thinking that the mail from the old dentist was a checkup reminder, I put it aside.
A few days ago, as I was going through all the crap mail that I get and shredding it, I saw the mail again. Imagine my surprise when I saw I had a past due balance due of close to $200.
I had last visited this dentist in August of 2007. More than 16 months later, they finally sent me the bill. No explanation. Just that I owed $200. This place has screwed up my bill before, confusing me with a 70-year-old man.
So, upon seeing the bill, I called the dentist's office last weekend, leaving a message asking why I owed this when clearly my old insurance would have covered the bill.
This afternoon, I received a phone call from the office. The stupid woman told me that the office had submitted the claim, but they never received any correspondence from the insurance company. More importantly, they had never received the money to cover my visit.
So, this stupid woman asked if the insurance company had mailed the check to me. No, I explained. This stupid woman than explained that the office had, allegedly, submitted the claim twice and heard nothing from the insurance company.
"Did you try calling them?" I asked.
"Oh, well it's a pain dealing with the insurance company," she said. "Sometimes, we have better luck if the patient calls the insurance company."
Wha.....?
"So, did your office make any attempt whatsoever to actually place a phone call to the insurance company?"
More hemming and hawing. More I don't know-ing.
"So, you can't call the insurance company right now and ask them what's going on?"
"Well....uh....uh....uh...."
By this point I was furious. For one thing, I'd been woken up. I work nights, after all, and I gotta sleep during the day to have any chance of not working while dead. That I can understand, as they're working during normal business hours. Anyway. For another, they sent me a bill sixteen frakking months after I'd actually been there, with no explanation, with no reason why I owed it. For another thing, I went out of my way to visit this particular dentist.
This particular dentist, and my former general physician, both had offices pretty close to my parents' house. I'd been to both since my family moved to Chicago more than 20 years ago. My parents have fallen on hard financial times in the last few years, and both offices had previously made efforts to work with my parents in still getting them the care they needed with a price plan they could afford.
For that matter, I wasn't doing so hot financially for a number of years. It took me several years and some hard work to get a good credit score after falling into trouble in my early 20s.
So, I continued to visit these particular doctors because I figured that if they helped my folks, I should continue to do business with them.
Take that all into account, and I think you'd feel pretty betrayed by this, too.
Yeah, I was pissed off. I'm still pissed off.
I'm pissed off because this frakking place wants me to do their work. Shouldn't they be contacting the insurance company? Couldn't they place a phone call? A simple frakking phone call?
So, in the interests of protecting my credit, I called the insurance company. A five-minute conversation revealed everything I needed to know. They haven't received any claims for all of 2007. The last claim they filled for me was in 2006, which coincidentally was the previous time I'd visited this dentist. To get the claim filled, the dentist must provide proof that they filed the claim before the one year deadline, which was August of this year.
This was all painfully simple stuff. This was something that a simple phone call from the office to the insurance company could have resolved. This was something that should never have involved me, especially more than a year after I last visited. This was something that could have easily been documented in my file.
So, after calling the insurance company, I called the office back. I advised them that this level of ineptitude and laziness is unacceptable. I advised that they need to work this out with the insurance company. I advised that their failure is not my problem. I advised her to call the insurance company and get the information they needed. Chances are she won't.
The next step is a written letter to the office, either hand delivered by me or sent via certified mail. Considering the level of screwups that have occurred, those are my options. I can't trust standard mail or a fax to these idiots. If they don't misplace it, they won't know what to do with it.
There is zero chance of me paying this bill. If the dentist doesn't get his money, that's not my problem. I was covered under insurance at the time of the visit. The office's failure to follow up properly and make sure they got paid is not my problem.
I know it won't make much difference, but I will make every effort to publicize the sheer stupidity employed by this dentist. I'll go to the Better Business Bureau.
Stuff like this clearly demonstrates why loyalty never goes unpunished.

AT&T rant continued....

This is hilarious.
According to the AT&T paid mouth, it was difficult for them to notify customers about the outage because the service was allegedly only sporadically affected. In the same statement, the mouth attributes the problems to a power outage in a specific area.
Hmmm. So, you can pinpoint it, but you can't tell folks about it. Interesting.
This problem shouldn't have happened in the first place. The tomfoolery is compounded by the lack of any specific communication to the public in a decent amount of time.
Make no mistake, AT&T knows, or at least should know, which customers would be affected by this type of outage. It should be a simple matter to say, "AT&T customers in (insert cities and states here) may experience (insert types of service disruption) due to a commercial power outage at our facility in (insert location here). We are working to restore service as quickly as possible. We apologize for any trouble this has caused."
Simple. See?
Yet by not explaining, the company only creates more questions.
That is, it creates questions for those few who actually care to ask.

AT&T has the most screwups of any national carrier!

I love stories like this lovely linkage.
Please allow me to put on my telecom/tech hat for a moment. Stuff like this shouldn't happen unless there's a severe lack of redundancy or a really major disaster, like, oh, Hurricane Katrina.
Big facilities, like the one that lost power in Michigan, usually have battery and generator backups for commercial power outages. These facilities are sometimes unmanned. I'm sure there were relatively few, if any, people at this particular facility at the time of the outage.
That the facility was possibly unmanned at the time of the power outage isn't itself a screwup. That the facility ran on backup power and then lost service is a major screwup.
Explanation: all telecom companies have NOCs, Network Operations Centers. Most carriers have one nationwide, bigger ones, like AT&T, have two. These NOCs monitor alarms for any elements tied to their network. There are some more exotic alarms that my feeble mind can't explain, but the really important alarms are telco and environmental alarms. Telco alarms typically occur if there's a problem with the cable between a cell site and the landline provider. Environmental alarms are things like door intrusions, loss of power, high temp, etc.
These alarms are relayed to the NOC, where someone monitors these alarms and responds accordingly. A power alarm at an individual cell site is a big deal, enough to open a top severity case. A power alarm at the Bloomfield facility, which handles service for a wide geographic area, should not only be ticketed right away, it should be escalated to upper management. Phone calls should be made to make sure reserve power can be maintained until such time as commercial power can be restored. This means hauling in huge batteries, fueling generators, and so forth.
Big facilities like the one in Bloomfield usually have enough batteries and generator fuel to provide power for at least a few hours.
Trust me when I say I'm not just spouting random nonsense. I've seen a facility like the one in Bloomfield firsthand, and I've monitored stuff like this in the past. I know how stuff should be backed up, and I know what the response to something like this should be.
One thing I would like to point is the minimum amount of time that passed between the time the power outage occurred and the time that AT&T's service was affected. According to the article I posted above, Chicago's wireless service was interrupted at about 9:30 a.m. Sunday.
However, this lovely linkage from the Detroit Free Press quotes one woman who noticed her power was off at 5 a.m. Eastern time, which of course is 4 a.m. Central.
Using my mad math skills, that's at least five and a half hours between the time that commercial power was lost and the time that AT&T wireless service was actually affected. That's time that someone should have opened a ticket, called the power company, notified management, and called someone who actually worked at that facility to get their asses over there and make sure the generators were working.
I believe the word that applies here is fail. Maybe even two words: epic fail.
Of course, you won't see any reporters question this. "Oh, power's out, what can you do?" Few people actually know how things work or are even interested in learning remotely how things work.
Here's what I would really like to know. When did AT&T become aware of the power outage? If it was indeed at 9:30 a.m. Central, why didn't they know about it sooner? If they did know about it early Sunday morning, what was the response? When were field technicians engaged? Why did so much time pass between the time of the initial power outage and the time customer service was affected? How does the company plan to avoid situations like this in the future?
But hey, what do I know? I'm no good. That's why they laid my ass off last year. All in the name of Ed Whitacre's $160-million retirement package.
My job. Delivered.

Why Metallica no longer deserves my money

Believe it or not, there are times that Dan raises legitimate points about things. A tale of a blind squirrel finding the occasional nut comes to mind. Having seen his comment about my Metallica dislike, I figured I should point out why they get no more money from me.
Yes, the Napster episode is a big reason. Initially, I believed in their point of view, that they reserve the right to profit from their own materials. They wrote and performed the stuff after all. However, Metallica's rise to popularity came about largely from a heavy bootlegging culture. In their very early days, the band heavily encourage tape swapping. In my opinion, Napster was a lot like that when Metallica basically shut it down.
Metallica made their living from being counter-culture, anti-authority, anti-mainstream. So, for them to swoop in like vultures in the whole Napster fiasco made them look more than a bit like hypocrites. Bands sell image along with their music and whatever message that music has. So, when you're playing along with the government to clamp down on something you once endorsed, that makes you lose some fans. You've ruined the image that helped you sell so many records.
And before anyone says anything about reserving the right of an artist to make a profit, I say if you really believed that, then you'd go out and buy legit copies of every single song you've ever copied from anywhere. So, how many MP3's do you have from albums you've conveniently borrowed from someone?
Even more important to my reasoning is the quality, or lack thereof, in the band's more recent output. I ran out and bought St. Anger like a good little fanboy when it was released. I've farted better music than anything that appeared on the album. I tried listening to it, really. I gave it a few listens. I haven't been able to make myself listen to it in over five years. Between the tin can drum sound, Hetfield's melodramatic wailing and the lack of anything resembling anything good, I'd have to say it's the single worst album that I own.
I tried to listen to the most recent stuff. Some of it sounded halfway decent. It was a bit like a waking dream, when you're talking to a long-dead loved one. The voice sounds familiar, and you even think they've come back. Then you wake up, realizing it was all just a dream. The Unforgiven was a good tune. Unforgiven 2? Uh, I guess. Unforgiven 3? That's a rehash I just don't need to deal with.
That's about it. The band has betrayed their fan base, and they can't make any more good music. That's why they don't get my money anymore.

Merry Christmas to all!

Dan likes this one. So do I, for that matter. Audio is required for full enjoyment.

Chinese Democracy: some thoughts

Yes, the punchline is now a reality. And yes, I was compelled to buy the album.
Yes, I know Axl fired everyone from the original lineup, save himself. Yes, I know the band lineup changed several times between the Use Your Illusion albums and the new one.
And still, the album is pretty good.
I think the album would have sounded much better if it had come out, oh, 10 years ago or so. There's clearly some industrial and hip hop sound on the album.
The album cost several million dollars to produce. Thankfully, some of it comes through on the finished product. Note to other bands (I'm looking at you, Metallica): poor production does not equal edginess or metal-ness. It just equals crap.
As songs go, there are a number of standouts. I personally like Scraped, Better, Sorry and Riad And The Bedouins. There's a ballad or two I could do without, but overall, I think the album is pretty good.
It's something of a minor miracle that Axl released it at all.
If Axl can finally release Chinese Democracy, then I can finally publish the next great American novel.
Just give me another 10 years or so.

Dump the Antibacterial Soap

I am amazed at the power of marketing and hysteria in the U.S. of freakin' A at times. Then again, considering the previous posts, not really.

But something that I think I should at least mention is the scourge (scourge, I say!) of antibacterial soap.

"Whaaaaat? You're off your meds again." True! But that doesn't mean I'm wrong.

We have been told, through our watchful media, that bacteria are bad. Bacteria are germs, germs are bad, and so we shall kill them whereever they hide. It makes sense.

The problem is, these people told you eggs were bad, then they weren't. They told you MSG was bad for you, until it wasn't. Fluorine in water- bad, until it's not. They tell you fat is bad for you, until it isn't. Carbs are bad, unless, y'know, they're not. Gluten is the new rage fad food-to-hate.

As with everything the media reports on, they never do their jobs by reporting balanced news- that's hard. No. Sensationalism- especially when it comes to science- that sells! Scare people with psuedo-science and they'll feel grateful.

Your body is covered in bacteria, whether you like it or not. Even better- it is theorized that there's more bacteria on you than you have skin cells! Yet, surprisingly, you're not dead?

That's because there is some bacteria that lives in symbiosis with you. (that means the lives of both benefit from each other's presence, Hronek) 70% of your bacteria lives in your gut. It breaks down components of your food and allows it to be absorbed by the body. They also enable white blood cells. In fact, the cleaner you are the more likely you are to be susceptable to random diseases, like colds and flu.

http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/Antibacterial_cleaning_products?open

http://www.ei-resource.org/expert-columns/dr.-gloria-gilberes-column/bacteria:-the-good,-bad-and-the-ugly/

http://intlxpatr.wordpress.com/2007/03/18/bacteria-helpful-not-harmful/?referer=sphere_related_content/

http://media.www.thenorthernlight.org/media/storage/paper960/news/2008/11/11/MedicalIncredible/AntiBacterial.Helpful.But.Possibly.Harmful.In.The.Long.Run-3537672.shtml

The use of antibacterial soaps kills all bacteria, sure. Including, eventually, the good ones. Strangely enough, all soap is inherently antibacterial. The difference is that soaps labeled "antibacterial" contain added bacteriocides. There is a place for antibacterial soaps- hospitals. That's it. Humans don't need antibacterial soap. In a way, it's similar to the thought process "if one aspirin is good, then ten will really help."

I don't even know what impact these soaps have on the water supply, as it works its way through the sanitization plants and their filters of bacteria, then out into the water supply, into water plants and fish. I mean, no one is projecting panic over it and maybe it is effectively filtered somewhere... but it can't be good.

My advice- dump the antibacterial and get a bottle of plain ol' liquid soap. I haven't used antibacterial soap at home in over 5 years, and I haven't gotten a cold or flu once either. An oversimplification, sure, but it's at least semi plausible.

Piling On da Gov

"The conduct would make Lincoln roll over in his grave," Fitzgerald said.

"The charges in the criminal complaint are, in fact, staggering. They are stunning. Eyepopping. Gobsmacking. Jaw-dropping. Appalling. Unprecedented in their alleged brazenness." -Eric Zorn, Chicago Tribune

"Many, including myself, thought that the recent conviction of a former governor would usher in a new era of honesty and reform in Illinois politics," FBI special agent in charge Grant said.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chi-governors,0,1319988.htmlpage

http://www.reuters.com/article/vcCandidateFeed2/idUSTRE4B854120081209

http://weblogs.cltv.com/news/opinion/mcclendon/2008/08/nepotism-cronysim-and-chicago.html

http://dig.lib.niu.edu/ISHS/ishs-2004autumn/ishs-2004autumn255.pdf

Really? This isn't an excuse for hyperbole or other dramatic language? This is not shocking to anyone who's cast a semi-critical eye on Illinois government since 1850.

"In Illinois, with its flamboyant history of corruption, those [charges] are only too believable." -Mary Schmich, Chicago Tribune

"In a city like Chicago, with its history of muscle and clout and corruption, it's probably not the first time—just the first we know of." -Prof. Norman Sims, U. Mass-Amherst

I have said since I moved away that I have nothing against the people of Illinois. Except Hronek. F*^k Hronek. No, not them- I wish to see every member of Illinois government brutally sodomized while they serve the consecutive life sentences they all deserve. There may be a few that are decent. Oscar Schindler tried to fight against the tide too, all that got him was an occasional mention in obscure history books and a movie- and he saved the Jews during the Holocaust. The baby has to go with the bathwater here.

"The state of Illinois is on kind of a bad run," Sen. Harry Reid (D) NV

Senators aren't supposed to be kings of understatement, there, Har. YOU THINK?!?!?

And for you mouth breathing leftists that hate Republicans, this guy and all their ilk are from the camp that claims to represent YOU. Fitzgerald's better than his label. You better hope to Obama that he doesn't find a link to the President Elect. Like, I don't know, a guy like Tony Rezko or Billy Ayers.

Blagojevich. Democrat. (D)-IL. Who else....?

Maybe he and George can play hide the soap

Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich was arrested earlier this morning.
Shockingly, the allegations include federal corruption charges. I know, this is difficult to believe, considering the level of honor and respect Illinois politicians have served their constituents.
Wow. Just....wow.
I didn't think Rod would get arrested while still in office. Guess he left enough of a trail that he could finally be charged.
It's funny. When Rod first ran for governor 6 years ago, George Ryan was in the midst of a federal investigation. Rod had promised "change."
The only thing that changed was whose hands taxpayers' money was funneled to.
One of the more interesting, and by interesting I mean f#^@ing frightening, accusations is that Blagojevich had offered state help to Tribune upper management in selling the Cubs in exchange for firing editors critical of him and his administration.
Have I mentioned I don't like this guy?
No wonder so many politicians in Illinois want stricter gun laws. They're afraid people will take up arms against them.
Have I also mentioned yay second amendment?
And yay first amendment?
Ugh. No wonder so few people vote here.
I wonder what the conversation between Rod and George will be like when they're both in the slammer.

An Open Response to the AT&T Complainant

For those unaware (and the 3 or 4 people other than the authors who actually read this), I used to work for AT&T. I lost my job about 14 months ago when it was decided it would be cheaper to fund outgoing CEO Ed Whitacre's $160 million golden parachute than to keep some jobs in Chicago. The worthless union cost me and my colleagues some significant severance pay, not to mention benefits.
Yeah, I'm still bitter.
Dan's situation sucked. I would not have wanted to deal with the same problems. We spoke briefly about a month ago about this, and the only thing I could really tell him was to get service somewhere other than AT&T, even if it meant spending more than he wanted to.
I'm not a fan of the company's service, nor am I a fan of how they treat their employees.
It is in that spirit I have written the following reply to Dan's open letter. Please note I don't agree with how Dan was treated, no matter how much I may hate him. This response is intended to mock AT&T, not Dan.
Dear sir/madam;
Thank you for your letter concerning your perceived vision of our failures. It always entertains us to read a letter from someone thinking they can make a difference.
We were even more entertained by the various ways in which you called us stupid. To know that you would waste so much time and intellect on something we don't care about gladdens our hearts.
If you think we don't care about your business, you're right. Let's be honest: your piddly stream of income for cheap services amounts to a raindrop in the ocean. Do you really think you're going to get the same treatment as someone who pays a lot more money to us? Really? Now, who's the stupid one?
We think it's cute that you'll tell everyone to not get our service. Let us know how that works out for you. For every rare, supposedly intelligent individual like yourself, we have a hundred stupid sheep lining up to get our service.
You know why? It's called PR. Word of mouth means nothing. Word from commercials and other advertisements carry the day. If we pay to say we have the most reliable service, clearly it must be true.
Please. Continue your one-man gang war on us. We need the laugh. We expect you'll have the same success in this as every other sorry sack who's said the same thing. Very original of you. In the meantime, we'll continue to increase our government influence and squash competition.
We are particularly pleased with your ISO 9001 reference. Ooooooh, scary. Do you think we really care? Do you think we don't know how to hide these sorts of things? Please. The only thing transparent about this company is the tape we use for cable repairs.
We'll file this in the same place we file all complaints from people as equally insignificant as you. Thanks for saving us money on toilet paper.
The fact of the matter is we are too big to fail. We make money. We have friends with more power than you could possibly conceive. We have the most customers, the most money, the most power, the best employees. We have the fewest dropped calls. Just look at our advertising. The fact is you really don't have much choice.
And when you're left with no other choice but us, we will welcome your grovelling and your money with open arms.
Say hi to your wife for us.
Sincerely,

The new AT&T.
Your ass. Delivered.

An Open Letter to AT&T

Dear AT&T Quality Assurance Personnel:

I'm writing this letter to inform denizens of the web, those who may search through Google and Yahoo and any other search engine, about how horrible your ability to perform basic phone services has become.

I'm not disgruntled. I'm furious. Your incompetence drove my wife to tears, inconvenienced our lives for over 6 weeks, and lost our business.

We chose to subscribe to AT&T land service via your website. We've done this before and all efforts have gone well multiple times in places other than Maryland. In Maryland, however, your company is too cheap to afford technicians that can count on things other than their fingers.

After being quoted 5-10 business days for installation, we were disappointed to learn the earliest installation date would be 12 business days later. On the day of the first scheduled installation, you cancelled. Your techs said they were too busy. They were too busy the next day. And the next. We called whatever number you gave us, and they gave us the same song and dance. Our phone was installed a week late.

We also requested that you install DSL on our phone line. Again, no problems with previous service in places other than Maryland. But in Maryland, your organization has difficulty not swallowing its tongue. Nowhere on your website does the DSL service installation say "you need to first have a phone line, THEN request DSL." So we were told that we couldn't have DSL because, duh, we had no phone. We were then told we needed to schedule the technician to install DSL... and that the installation date would be 5-10 business days later.

Not only was our phone installed a week late, but it was installed with the wrong phone number. We called whatever number you gave us, and they essentially said, "Huh. That's weird," and hung up on us. We called again, and they said "we'll figure it out and call you back."

I would have thought that working for the phone company, you may have the ability to press the number buttons on a phone. But your fingers were too busy probing orifices in your body to press the buttons, because we never received that call. Then again, you may have been trying to call us with the number we ordered but that your technicians were too incompetent to install.

TWO WEEKS later, we finally had a phone rep at a number that alledged to do service for you, try and solve the problem. After my wife spent FOUR HOURS on the phone, waiting for your crack bureaucracy to figure out how to tie their shoes, she was told that they would... call her back. I have never heard my wife scream in anger until that moment.

Eventually, one of your atypical representatives spun a resonable (if not accurate) sounding story about how your repair department said we had phone service but your main business said we did not, and that the technician just flipped a switch to give us phone service instead of giving us the phone number we requested. This person was helpful and friendly, very understanding, and I have no doubt that you have already fired her for being overqualified.

After she figured out what to tell us, she told us that yes, we would have to wait another 5-10 business days. Throw a few holidays into this mix. Then we could get DSL, once the phone was installed and would have to wait an additional 5-10 business days which would have pushed into December. Not only that, but a DSL modem- one that we already had from previous service with your bungling company- was going to be sent to us even though we asked one not be sent. The reason- because you have to send one. We were told to just refuse delivery. Normally I would ask how stupid a company would have to be to spend money on shipping for an item that the customer has declined in advance, but the track record is well established by now.

Your company, utterly incapable of making logical business decisions, scheduled to send us a DSL modem that we didn't need. We figured that since the technician's union likely has from Thanksgiving until Easter as a holiday, it made sense to forgo DSL installation as we were not going to actually receive it until May.

The unfortunate fact for you is that I was able, within the span of three days, to obtain a cable modem and have broadband internet installed. Three days. Not 6-12 business weeks.

You can consider this a "complaint." As a former ISO 9001 auditor, I might suggest you file this complaint under "total company failure." Optionally, you may file individual complaints with: your internet site for not reserving the requested phone number, the repair department for not communicating with other departments to determine why phone installation had not occurred, your customer service department for not knowing how to solve a customer problem at least four times, two complaints with your technicians for being three days late and installing the wrong number, and your top management for allowing this farce you call operations to continue in this manner.

You are not too big to fail. Might as well focus on the iPhone, it's the only business on which you haven't completely dropped the ball. I'm telling everyone I know not to get your phone service. Good luck watching your core business crash and burn.

Daniel Walter